...I used to make little visits...run into the house hug her and leave before we said too much...this time after being threatened that i would be fatherless if i didnt open my legs up for this man....i had to ask her...i had to know! Now it didnt make sense anymore ! By now i was sure that in order for me to be conceived a man must have known my mother...and times without number i wanted to ask her...this man that was sleeping with me was not my father and no i was sure he would never be no matter how many times we had sex! I just had to ask this time...no matter what i felt i had to...
(Yes my upbringing was a little warped now and there were a lot of things i should have been exposed to that i didnt have the opportunity for! On one of our visits out of town ...my sis, cousin and i had to go with the family to continue to be maids (yes we didnt get holidays) to these people. My sister could not take it anymore...She fled! I had no one else...my cousin and i were not that close! While i was distraught i tried to seek comfort from this cousin...but little did i knw that when the 'holiday' would be over and we returned my cousin would run away too! So i was all alone....no one to turn to...to learn from the way i should have from my 'primary' environment.)
I asked her after coming into her house looking very pensive...she locked the door behind me thinking there would be a need to stop me out after 2 minutes as usual... I told her there was no need...i said i needed to talk to her...
"Mama...please you must answer me...i have neva asked you for anything till now...and i dont think i would after this...please mama who is my father?" This woman her eyes wide and looked away for what felt like a long time...then she took a deep breath and gave a resigning sigh and said to me "My child you know i did everything because i wanted you to have more than i or your siblings ever did...it is because i love you i sent you away you know that" I didnt say anything...i just looked her straight in the eye to let her now that i was not satisfied because she had not answered my question...this she understood and took another deep breath "Your father is the man you have been staying with all this while my dear...the man who is taking care of you now..." I said "No mama i mean...who is the man that you slept with that helped you conceive me...who is my biological father mama?! Or do you not know who he is?!" She laughed and said "Sometimes i wish that was the case but no...my answer remains the same...that man is your father. I swear on my mothers grave." I couldnt believe it...i could hear nothing after that...but apparently i was screaming and i held her in a firm grip then i found my words yelling at the top of my voice that this man had made me sleep with him almost every nite since i was 12 years old with promises of fatherhood...only to find he is my father anyway! All she could say was she was sorry and that i should forgive him and try and forget about it...WHAT! After that i felt sooo much disgust towards her...could not look at her...could not stand to be in the same room with her...so i demanded that she open up the door and i left...
Apparently this man...and my mother where an item...a looong time ago. They were in love then he went away to school...my mother could not afford this and she assumed they would get married when he got back so she was not exactly bothered. He used to come home to visit and sleep with her and everytime she got pregnant she bore his kids assuming they were going to be a happy family when he was thru. Unfortunately this was not the case...while at school he met Lady Joe...a more educated woman...who had 'class'... He decided he would not marry a village girl but someone that would help with his reputation, and his new ambitions ( he wanted to become the governor and this he did attain) However since y mother had children for him already he was obliged to at least provide accommodation for us...and then go away to make his own 'legal' family elsewhere. However i was not born yet...this man used to come to my mothers place to visit...and sleep with her still...thats how i came about...
My mother could not provide for us all thats why she sent my sister and i to stay with him...thinking he would treat us like his children...which we were of course. Lady Joe however knew about us and thats why she treated us that way...thats why she hated us!
This time...there was a young male neighbour of ours who had feelings for me...apparently Lady Joe had feelings for him as well..when she found out he was looking for me and not her...she made the entire family move house! There was an incomplete building that was their's...it was under construction but she was sooo vexed she had to make us live there just so the boy would not see me... We are in a lovely relationship now btw...lol....
This happened a long time ago...or at least in my mind its been a while...my heart still hurts and im still confused...i have tried to understand the plan...or what i am supposed to take away from the fact that i had a screwed up childhood...literally. So i just thank God...for it all...especially that i have moved on...and dont feel as disgusted with myself or my mum as before...
I have moved far away from that family that brought me pain...i am somewhat happy now wiv a job and a place of my own....i am finding it difficult to take my relationship to the next level ...he is being very patient but would he really accept all the messed up bits of me? He has options now...marrying me wud give him none but me...how would he deal...would he leave me or threaten me into something...am i fully past this...
Yes this is a true story and every name you have seen here is real...well my name is not Ekaette but i am just a serious case of one that most people refer to...
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